Passing Fancy

People who get the cards on this site will get have a special appreciation for the comparison between Sunday's Colts-Packers game and the legendary Colts-Jets shootout in 1972.

But it's a different game today. For all of Sunday's fireworks, it didn't quite measure up to this vintage Namath performance. Unitas was very 2004-like that day: 26-for-45 for 376 yards and 3 TDs. That's about 14.5 yards per completion, noteworthy only be today's standards. Namath that day? 15-for-28 for 496 yards. Everyone talks about the six TDs. But 496 yards on 15 completions is a mark that will likely never be approached. That's 33 yards per completion. Tom Brady averages about 10 yards per completion. The all-time single season record is Greg Cook at about 17.5. Namath in '72 finished just under that.

Favre and Manning clocked in yesterday at about 12 yards and 14 yards per completion, respectively. So it was an aerial show with a decided west coast flavor. In fact, the most Namath '72-like performance yesterday was Daunte Culpepper's 360 yards on 19 completions (coming off last Monday's dink-and-dunk fest where he Culpepper's 343 yards required a whopping 37 completions). It's generally accepted that yards per passing attempt is the best indicator for wining and losing a game. (That's why we emphasize it so much in our NFL Forecast posted every Friday.) But I wonder if yards per completion is just as good or even better.

On Sunday, the QBs with the higher yards per attempt went 11-1 (McNair and Leftwich tied). The one loss was by the Bengals. Now I suspect my friend Scott Pianowski is going to say, "No duh." Well, if it's so obvious, why don't I hear more about that correlation compared to, say, the team with the most rushing attempts winning the game (when, in truth, you run because you're winning, you're not winning because you run).

Speaking of that Titans-Jaguars game, I've about had it with Leftwich and company. This is one lucky team. I don't believe in destiny (or Beatles or Zimmerman, just Yoko and me). The hail mary against Buffalo (yeah, you can throw a hail mary from the seven-yard line), the Griffin fumble instead of the chip-shot, game-winning Elam field goal? Now the phantom pass interference call.

I predict the Jaguars will need more than one scoring drive to beat Manning and Co. come Sunday. I'm going to make sure to put that game on the big screen here in mission control.

Do yourself a favor and read my wife Catherine's Football Widow Blog. She's a great writer and I think she'll eventually end up being much more widely syndicated than me. All wives with football-loving husbands are sure to sympathize with Cath's Sunday plight.

But, in my defense, it's not easy sitting around here all day watching games while she's out galavanting with the kids. Here's the thing about the NFL Sunday Ticket: there are no breaks in the action. No respite. Heck, there's not even any real halftime. Try planing lunch around that. And then when you do get around to eating, there are pitfalls. Real danger lurking in the weeds. First you have to decide how long to heat Ryan's virtually untouched (despite repeated pleading and outright bribes), leftover chicken lo mein. If you want the food properly reheated, you have to deal with the molton bowl. And try carrying that down the basement stairs without burning your fingers. Unable to cup it in your hand, you need to decide whether to hold it by the lip with both hands and struggle down the stairs with a drink and napkin underneath your arms. Or do you transfer to a cool plate and make an additional mess? No. I grab a kitchen towel and use it to insulate the heat from my hands and free up my other hand for the napikin and drink. Mind you, this is without an eye in the sky or coaches screaming instructions into my headset. And all with the play clock running down before one of those seven or eight games is set to kick off the second half. But I keep that all in. I internalize this Sunday stress fest. Not anymore.

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Week 2 Notebook

Patrick Ramsey was scary bad this week. Do you know that dream where you're back in school and it's time to take the test and you know you haven't studied in like 20 years and you're toast? Ramsey lived the QB equivalent of that dream. He played so poorly you'd have a tough time arguing with the conspiracy gamblers who swear every game is fixed. I mean, you couldn't play as poorly as Ramsey did if you were trying.

But Ramsey was only the second most scary thing on TV this afternoon. More creepy by far were the countless promos for the Dr. Phil special where he tells the mom that her kid has 11 of 16 traits of a serial killer. That's cold, bro'. Seriously, I feel queasy sometimes making fantasy predictions. Telling a mom that her son is going to turn Dahmer? I don't know where people get the nads for that type of thing, honestly. And why does anyone want to watch such nonsense? I mean, can't we find some more dwarfs to marry or something equally edifying? How many serial killer traits does Donald Trump have? Now that's a show I'd watch.

I'm putting a screaming SELL on Curtis Martin this week. Mawae might be hurt, the Dolphins are coming up in Miami after the bye and he can't possibly sustain the workload. Our eyes weren't lying the last couple of years. Plus he was generally unimpressive after the opening quarter in San Diego. Lock in those profits and get second- or even first-round value right now and you won't be sorry.

My friend and fantasy football analyst supreme Scott Pianowski (who I write the Breakfast Table with here each week) just e-mailed me his observations. He's sticking a fork in Leftwich, who I beat to death in the early (Spokesman) and late (Courier Times) versions of the syndicated column last week (in between everyone got a somewhat muted sell on the ultimately injured Stephen Davis). He thinks Chris Brown is a lock to be a top 10 back this year if he stays healthy. I agree, but worry about those injuries on the offensive line. Pianow was always a big Brown backer. I thought he was too upright until I was completely swayed by a cutback that demonstrated great vision coupled with a vicious stiff arm of the great Roy Williams during the preseason. Better late than never, I guess. I drafted him 17th overall in my most important league (a 14-teamer). Brown has also come thisclose to two more TDs of plus-50 and plus-20 yards. So he has some pop for you people in distance leagues, which is the only way to play.

Speaking of Brown, the Titans really should have beaten Manning and Co. The lesson here is the one teams have been taught since the leather helmet days: don't waste early scoring opportunities when you're physically domininating the opposition. I'm going to put a buy on Reggie Wayne. He had a bunch of passes thrown to him in Week 1, including multiple passes in the end zone, and seems to me to be closing the gap on Marvin Harrison. I don't see Harrison as a 100-plus catch guy anymore, let alone the ridiculous 144 catches he posted in '02. He's about a 90, 95 guy and Wayne should be good for 70 or 75 with a decent chance at 10 TDs and a pretty high floor, too.

It's just sitting there for Justin Fargas in Oakland. Tyrone Wheatley is, SURPRISE!, Tyrone Wheatley. But Fargas can't play through turf toe. Oakland is intriguing. I like Gannon going forward. He still has the best pump fake in football and a good pump fake is poison to even the best NFL secondaries. Plus there's a lot of speed and athleticism everywhere at WR. And I've always believed that Kerry Collins was overrated. He throws the best skinny post in football and a very pretty ball. But Gannon has showed enough early to convince me he's still better. Heck, Kurt Warner might be better than Collins.

Jacksonville, Buffalo and Tampa Bay seem like fantasy graveyards. But many predicted that going into the season. Am I uneasy over Justin McCareins slow start? Of course, but I'm sticking to my guns until the Jets have played five games. Remember, Santana Moss hasn't scored, either. I feel like I slipped off the hook when "undervalued" Deuce McAllister sustained a high ankle sprain, which is always more serious than it seems. Sorry to you Deuce owners.

I'm going to Tivo the Charlie Sheen show, which I've never watched, just to see what the hell Elvis Costello is going to do on it. I'm a little sad, quite frankly, about Elvis going primetime. He's in the trinitiy for me with Woody Allen and Dylan. Either that show is way cooler than I ever thought (and I do LOVE those Nat Nast shirts I see in all the promos) or this is a very sad day for the '70s. Only time and Tivo will tell.

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RotoAction Kickoff

Welcome to RotoAction.com's Action Blog. Most of you have come to this site via my syndicated newspaper column. I want to thank my clients for their vision in addressing the growing market for premium-grade fantasy content.

You'll find that here, in our Breakfast Table thanks mostly to the great Scott Pianowski, in the NFL Forecast with the smart Salfino, my cousin David, in our roboust player profiles and, beginning in the near future, on this very blog. And make sure to check our Matchup Meter in the Newspaper Column area, where the unrivaled David Ferris ranks all the players each week based only on their upcoming opponent.

But there's more to this site, as well. The Breakfast Table features some of the best pure football analysis on the internet. Sample a pancake or two and see for yourself. My wife Catherine will bring her sharp, funny writing to our Football Widow blog, where she'll chronicle those long, thankless hours every Sunday with the kids while I'm lounging down here in mission control with the Direct TV "working."

Feel free to contact us with your questions via that link. Support our newspaper clients. And hang with us regularly during the NFL season -- the quickest 17 weeks known to man (but, as Cath will attest, not necessarily to woman).

Also, I want to thank Bo Blaze and Blaze Internet for their help in making the vision for this site a reality. Hopefully, it conjures up some fond memories for you, too, and reminds us all why we ended up here in the first place: for the pure love and joy of following this great game.

--Michael

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